Panacea – how to meet poly people into kink

What is Panacea and the Poly London Munch? Organiser David tells all about this lovely, inclusive event. Who goes? What happens at Panacea? Is this the crowd you’ve been hoping for and the kink event for you?

two men and a woman in black leather at a nightclub with ropes hanging from the ceiling.  The Panacea kink party is held in a 2 floor dungeon play space
Made by Midjourney Ai for the Panacea interview

How did the Panacea dungeon party get started?

The London Poly Munch group members started requesting more weekend socials and it became a tradition for us to go to kink events together in the evening.  We did that a few times but sometimes found the events were not geared up for non-monogamy or play. My triad were told only 2 of us could enter the “couples” room.  So we decided to create our own events that are play-focussed and non-mono friendly and they were instantly a big success. 

What sort of event is it and what makes Panacea special?

First off, it’s a really great dungeon and 100% of the venue is geared up for BDSM play.  Secondly, we’re super welcoming and friendly – you will be hard pressed to find a better place to connect with the London Non-Monogamous Kink community. Our key objective is bringing people together for memorable and life enhancing experiences.  The London Poly Munch is the intersection between Polyamory (love, connection, ethical non-monogamy) and BDSM play.  Our primary value is of inclusion and all are welcome. 

genderqueer men talking to women by Midjourney Ai for the panacea dungeon kink party interview and poly london munch

We often see larger groups coming or even forming.  I get a real buzz when I see new connections being created and the associated elation from the experiences at the events.  Also I have observed the non-monogamous/poly community tend to be very creative in their kink, which can lead to some really interesting and varied scenes.  I’m pretty sure we’ve invented some new kinks along the way too!

How can people sign up and get tickets to Panacea?

You can join our secret Facebook group by contacting our page here:

https://www.facebook.com/LondonPolyMunch

Poly London Munch Facebook group icon

or you can friend our Fetlife profile here:

 https://fetlife.com/users/10274627

Midjourney Ai depiction of a polyamorous kink party in a dungeon for the Panacea interview

They are slightly different, the FB group is slightly more active and gives you membership and the cheapest discounts. The Fetlife group sends out occasional promotions, discounts and reminders to friends.

What should people wear and bring to Panacea?

Bring toys, we always love cool BDSM toys!  Fetish wear is preferred.  Check the profile photos and you’ll get the general idea.  We do allow nudity everywhere in the venue too 😉

body positive image of man and woman talking in black leather fetishwear made by Midjourney Ai

Is it suitable for couples, singles and polyamorous groups?

Yes! all are welcome, although we do encourage and prioritise groups, the bigger the better!  We often get asked about coming alone and we always recommend those that are nervous to join our socials and make friends first, and/or try to come with a friend or two if you can.  It’s always more fun that way, and actually cheaper as we offer group discounts.

body positive image of plus size big handsome man with red bard laughing as two women cuddle him made by Ai

What sort of activities are allowed and normally seen at Panacea?

We usually see a wide variety of types of BDSM play and our dungeon allows it as it has some superb equipment and furniture.  Attendees and crew also usually bring some pretty fun toys.  You will usually see one or two electrical scenes with some of the beautiful antique sets.  Lots of the usual impact, although sometimes the bottoms might be upside down, or spinning and there are usually groups playing. 

Man and two women in fetishwear playing with chains in a dungeon

There are no restrictions and things do often get messy, it can get hard to tell how many people are in a scene sometimes and which body parts belong to whom!  Our intimacy area has only one rule: no singles.  This is a place for groups to play in a quieter more intimate space.  We get needle and medical play and different varieties of bondage with cages as well as some really good rope scenes.  We have a dedicated rope specialist and rope area with a variety of suspension options.  This always gets some good attention and we usually get some talented Shibari or rope enthusiasts joining in.

rope chains and cage image made by Ai

How should a newcomer get the most out of their first time at Panacea?

Come to the socials first, make friends, come with people if you can.  Talk about your kinks, likes and dislikes and ask around if you are interested in the same types of play as people you meet.  Always ask first, be respectful of scenes and particularly people recently coming out of them.  If in doubt reach out to our crew, there are a lot of us and we are always keen to help with anything we can.  Also bring toys, the weirder the better, it will get people interested and they may want to try them out with you!

bearded man and woman with glasses and rainbow background

What is the difference between Panacea and the Poly London munch?

Panacea is the dungeon party of the London Poly Munch community.  

poly group having a laugh and a pint made by Midjourney Ai to demonstrate the Poly London munch- a free social event for polyamourous people and those interested in ENM

How did you get started in the poly and kink lifestyle?

Imagination applied to sexuality for the kink side.  Polyamory? I guess you could say I discovered it was in my nature.  Also, the more I found out about the history of monogamy the harder it was for me to accept it.  I could write a lot about this but in short I guess you could say I prefer to write my own rules for how to manage my relationships.  Rules that make sense to my loved ones and those that are in them, rather than rules that are imposed on me by others. 

You could call it a penchant towards freedom.  If you think about it, monogamy is about restriction.  The story of the bird sums it up nicely.  You can have a bird in a cage that will sing to you every day.  It might be happy because it has never known any other life.  If you let free and it comes back and still sings to you every day, then you know it is singing to you because it really wants to.  I am a bit of a hippy.  Because I believe love should be truly selfless, I would rather free the bird and it never come back and it be truly happy.

What do you wish people knew?

That they can always love more.

What’s the hardest thing about organising a party or social event?

Pleasing everyone! 

old fashioned artwork by Ai of a man in bed with two women

Are panacea and the poly munch commercial events?

We charge tickets to be able to hire dungeons and provide parties but the socials are free.  We have a simple rule, you either contribute by buying tickets or you are crew and help out..

How do you feel polyamory and the kink scene fit together?

I guess it’s a bit like having friends.  You may have one friend who likes bowling and another that likes roller-blading.  Take a switch for example.  If you have a partner who is a very submissive, you might also want to seek out a dominant so you can have your fill of both ends of the spectrum.  Same goes for sexuality.  If you are pan or bisexual, polyamory makes a lot of sense.  Also there are certain kinks that pretty much impossible without non-monogamy of some kind, e.g. group scenes

body positive image of man and woman of mixed race being tender made by Ai Midjourney for the Panacea and Poly Munch interview

Are any new projects in the pipeline?

I will be honest, Covid took out the momentum and it never fully returned to where it was.  Also you know, life, work, kids, and now home buying.  However, once we move, IF that ever happens, we will probably want to start building up some different events again.  Some ideas were creating a rope space in NW London, book/cinema clubs, mental health groups, learning workshops, boardgame and dating events… probably not till next year now though…

Is there somewhere people can learn more these events?

Best bet would be our FB page and group.  I will get around to recreating the site at some point.  On my list, honest!

Do you have any funny stories about the Poly Munch or Panacea?

OMG tons but those are best told in person.  Honestly come to a munch or picnic x

bearded silver fox older man in a wheelchair smiling wearing steampunk clothes for the panacea interview

Do you think poly or kink should be part of Pride in the LGBTQIA+?

Good question.  I think poly or alternative relationship/ lifestyle choices need more representation generally, so yes sure why not.  There is still a lot of prejudice against ethical non-monogamy.  Unlike some other categories there is very little (In fact, it may even be no) legal protection.  Being part of Pride would be a good step but a lot more would need doing…

two women dressed as fairies walking holding hands, Pride, lesbian, gay love by midjourney Ai for Panacea interview

Are the Panacea events disability accessible?

We do have disabled crew, e.g. one of us has only one leg, but unfortunately our favourite dungeon is on two levels and does not have a lift.  We do our very best to cater of wheelchair users and that usually involves some manual lift by the crew.  Something we do want to address but there is a real shortage of good venues in London still…

Are the events inclusive of race, body types and neurodiversity?

Yes! very much so.  This is very important to us.  You will find all types of people at the events.  The more different and diverse the better!  We probably have more neuro-diverse than not, to be honest.  Most of my polycule are on the spectrum.  If you let us know of any needs we can usually find a way to cater for them.

Man with beeard and glasses in wheelchair with rainbow dress black woman with a wand sitting on hi knee by Midjourney Ai

What sort of age range is welcome at the Panacea events?

Must be legal age but other than everyone is welcome! (i.e. over 18)

Is there anyone who would not be welcome or would not be able to attend?

This is very rare, but we occasionally have individuals who fail to respect other attendees and they will be removed and banned from events.  This includes people who get dangerously inebriated or fail to respect consent.  We have a lot of crew and we do our very best to keep attendees safe and happy.  

two men and one woman at a bar flirting made by Ai for panacea review interview, kink party in a dungeon for poly people

Are Panacea and the Poly Munches good places to find a new partner?

We have an excellent track record of bringing people and groups together, so sure why not! But if you treat it as a meat-market that will probably backfire.  Best to come with an open mind without any expectations and try to have fun.  

Is the community welcoming to newbies?

Definitely welcoming! We try not to take ourselves too seriously and always really keen to meet new people. 

If a single or couple likes the idea of kink or poly but are new to it are these good events to start with?

Perfect!

Are there any terms or etiquette people should learn before they come?

Hmmm… not really, but if anyone is genuinely interested in polyamory I would always recommend doing some research.  

*All images are produced by Midjourney Ai to represent the ambiance of the Panacea BDSM dungeon party and Poly London Munch events, to protect confidentiality and illustrate the vibe for this post. No real people have been depicted.

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