On Good Friday I made a little YouTube video about some issues that were coming up regarding ethics in swinger blogging. Specifically, commercialism, capitalism, maintaining integrity and how to walk the fine line between going under and telling the truth. If you are a blogger or content creator, you probably have the same questions, whether or not you write about swinging.
This youtube video was recorded on Good Friday, 2021
Spoken words -Ethics and Integrity in Swinger Blogging
Hello lovely libertines!
And happy good friday to you all. I think it seems like a great day to talk about integrity and what it actually costs. There was someone supposedly 2000 years ago who had some similar yet more drastic problems. I’m not expecting to actually be put on a cross anytime soon. At least not until lockdown’s over. But recently there have been a lot of things happening where basically everyone’s trying to make me into a massive capitalist. Now, that’s never going to work on a fundamental level. But on a practical level? It’s actually more difficult than it seems like to navigate.
What is the purpose of unicornhunting.blog?
So, I started the blog as a place where people could tell the truth because on the swing scene and the kink scene there is so much information out there, where people are just listening to what’s being put forward in the media. And what is put forward in the media is based on what people can afford to put forward in the media. So, if you have a massive marketing budget, everyone’s going to think your events are great, your products are great. If you don’t, however good your concept is your product is, you’re going to find yourself lost in the sea of the internet and search engines and that’s kind of the way it is. And I wanted to do something different, so I started up with no sponsorship, no funding, no ads, no paid promotions, nothing at all like that.
So, I paid for it off my own back and apart from the money of running a website, it is actually a huge, huge amount of labor investment. Trying to update it, trying to keep it running, trying to fix things, let alone the writing. Even if someone else writes a piece (which I love, because that’s the point – it’s meant to be a grassroots community effort) then i’m still spending hours tweaking it and getting it ready to put out to the world. And I want people to read the stuff, because unless people actually put themselves out there and express their opinion and their lived experience for real, without being paid to do it and paid to promote it, then ultimately we’re going to be lost in the future.
Why should we continue to make content? Are ethics in swinger blogging important?
Our lived experience is going to disappear. We’re going to be misunderstood and misrepresented. We can’t rely on the mainstream media to portray us accurately. If you are non-monogamous and that’s how you identify and you want to live that way, that doesn’t make you an object that’s to be chased around like something from Benny Hill. If you want to dress head to toe in latex, that doesn’t make you a joke. Nobody’s going to know that unless we tell our stories. And there are so many stories on there and there are so many interesting people who’ve found wonderful clever things to do. Who’ve made wonderful products, who’ve learned wonderful skills, who’ve done something different. Who are supporting the community.
Their stories deserve to be told. Now, in order to try and keep the site running, a little while ago I thought ‘You know, I’ll just do a couple of affiliate links.’ You might not know it, but almost all of the links on there are not paid for – they’re things where the person’s doing something good. They’re doing something clever. I’m trying to promote them because they’re a small person who’s doing something unique or it’s a really good event that’s really fun. So the only two affiliate links I put on there is one from Swing Towns which is a site I’m on and i use, because i thought ‘Well, if you’re reading about swinging it might be something that people want to do afterwards – is to sign up to a site,’ so it seemed rational.
Is unicornhunting.blog capitalist? Where do ethics in swinger blogging come into play?
It doesn’t make me that much money. It’s like a couple of quid a year, and the other one is Swinger Symbol jewellery (like this) because I spoke to the owners. They’re not doing it from a capitalist basis. It’s actually an open source – they haven’t copyrighted the symbol, so you can make your own things with symbol if you want. There are a lot of other companies that have just grabbed symbol and run with it, but I know this company is good. They deliver, they have good quality products and they’re not in it just to make a quick buck. They’re part of the community. They’re part of the lifestyle. So, to me, that seems like a good thing to promote as well.
Now, because of this, people have started getting in touch with me going, ‘I see you run affiliate links, I want to buy advertising, I want to do an advertorial for my product,’ including the dollies that I mentioned the other day on Instagram. The general population decided that was not going to be a good thing. And I kind of agree with you there, because it’s not objective. It’s not something I use, it’s not something that I can say, ‘This is a great product,’ it’s just someone out to make money. So I’m kind of glad you guys sided with me on that one.
Are people writing for unicornhunting.blog making a quick buck? Where do the ethics in swinger blogging get tricky?
I’ve also been contacted by people who said they wanted to write for the blog, so I’m like, ‘Great! More lived experience, more content, more information, more sharing of different aspects.’ But then when it comes down to it, what they actually want to do is do a sort of cosmo-magazine type thing. Where they recommend a bunch of products, or a bunch of sites, and they have paid sponsorship and affiliate links. I don’t even know if it’s stuff they’ve used. I can’t vouch for it. So, I’m feeling like, ‘No,’ because it’s a really slippery slope with integrity. So, if you start selling out in order to try and make a little bit more money, even though it’s not necessarily a lot of money, even though it’s probably just helping the site break-even and stay stay afloat, it’s something where you have to kind of draw a line.
And if the site starts to just do things because it’s paid for, then it’s the same as anywhere else and it has no purpose anymore. So, I didn’t go into it to make money. I wanted to share some experiences, make the world better, make it a little bit more inclusive. Try and help people understand how we’re connected and we’re the same. And share stories about problems that are found everywhere . ‘Why does this keep happening, why do we keep having a problem with that?’ Or events – events that are really really good and really fun but don’t necessarily have a huge marketing budget to put them out. So that everyone heard of them, everyone knows about them, everyone thinks they know what to expect. Because the marketing is never the reality.
What does unicornhunting.blog do? Are ethics in swinger blogging a factor? And what are they?
So, what’s even the point, unless anyone’s going to tell the truth. I also do interviews with people. I haven’t paid them for their interviews, but I do links to their stuff. Because a lot of them might be, I don’t know, teaching shibari or doing a workshop or something like that. So, if you’re interested in reading about their stuff then you might be interested in attending their workshop. Or finding out more. And some of them are trying to make a living doing it as well, so it seemed reasonable to support that.
But I think, ultimately, you have to draw a line as to what do you stand for. And it’s very easy to just go, ‘Oh, I’ll see how it goes,’ but it’s coming to that point I think. Where I’m having to make some choices. And I mean, unicorn hunting blog is not a charity. I don’t get any donations – it’s just a grassroots community movement. It’s not supposed to be the Alice story – that was never the point of it. I do do most of the writing for it, but I’d love more people to contribute as well. Yet I appreciate that’s time and effort and energy. But if we don’t, then who will? How will we be remembered?
What is the ultimate ethical purpose of unicornhunting,blog?
Because although I might be happy to wave the flag and say, ‘Yes I’m a freak,’ why should we be laughed at? Because we’re ultimately just trying to live our best lives. Find the best way to do that the same as anyone else. And any vanilla will go, ‘Oh you’re so brave!’
Why is it brave? Do you have to be brave just to be yourself? Why is it necessary to just dismiss everybody like that? So, if you have any thoughts about this or want to share something? Or have a strong feeling one way or the other about things like affiliate links – I mean, I don’t run ads. The only thing I had on there before was my book, which I think is fair enough. I can’t advertise the book anyway, because powers that be everywhere say it’s too adult. Which is ridiculous, compared to most books. Because it’s an advice book. But nonetheless, I put it on there. I figure if you like my writing, you might like my book as well. And there’s no pay walls – everything I do and put up is free for everyone to read.
The only other thing I do is I do some backlinks with some other sites. Because then I get traffic from them. They get traffic from me. And if everyone’s putting a lot of effort into producing something, then the last thing you really want is for it just to disappear and have no one read it. Because then what was the point? So get in touch with me and tell me what you think.
What is your ethical line in the sand as a blogger? Is it your money spinner? Or is there a line you just won’t cross? Where should that even be?
