The flirting style zodiac quiz
Welcome back to prospective life, lovely libertines! Ready to flirt again? Really? Let’s get our de-socialised selves in check ready to shake the living bejeezus out of what’s left of 2021. We’ve lost our game. We fall back into old bad habits. Let’s do a little stock check to see where we are all going to shoot ourselves in the foot this year, and hopefully mindfully bypass the worst of it with some conscious self-evaluation!
We all love to see our horoscopes predict our future. Yet this is just where we start. What is far more telling as to how things end up is to look at your patterns now and see how your habitual flirting styles are coming across to those you try to engage with. Unlike horoscopes, your creepy flirtation style zodiac is not set in the stars: it can be recognised, changed and help you learn how to live your best life, flirt right, stop shooting yourself in the foot and break away from failures of the past. Take this quiz now to see how you are coming across.
After each answer, there are a number of emoji symbols. Note down each one you score on, then see at the end how you add up. You may fall between two or more styles, check the explanations at the bottom to learn how your flirtation style is being read by those you want to connect with, and see where you can make changes to live your best life.
Ready? Oh, we are so ready. Of course you are ready. Rusty but ready. Here we go…
You are Flirting with someone on a dating app. They have chatted to you, agreed to meet and given you their number. Suddenly, they pop up on you facebook as a suggested friend. You:
a) Ignore it. Knowing too much would ruin the fun of the moment when you meet. Besides, you might get their details confused with someone else and it’s just way too much work to remember things about people you’ve spoken to that you haven’t even met yet. 😘🐔
b) Have a quick peek. Just to check they are legit and not already partnered. Time is precious. 😇🥴
c) Have a discrete look around, see where they went to school, who their friends are, learn about their hobbies and prepare some conversational material to woo them with. Decide if their childhood church would be good for your wedding, find similarities that indicate they are your dream partner 🕶 🐔
d) friend request them so they can see how cool you look on all your social media 🎺
e) friend request them, then when they accept go over all their photos from since they joined facebook, like them, comment on them and possibly change your status to dating them 🕶💪🤡
2. You see someone incredibly attractive jog past you in the opposite direction while you are walking in the street. You flirt by:
a) Shouting ‘run forest run’ to break the ice and grab their attention 🤡🎺💪
b) Changing direction subtly and follow to see their route. Joggers are creatures of habit and you can check the time to be sure you are there the same time each day that week to take it further. 🕶😇
c) Smiling and give them a thumbs up and motivational slogan 😘🥴
d) Appreciating the moment and walk past, wishing you could talk to them 🐔
You are out with a group of friends, and so is someone you’ve seen who you are attracted to. Your groups seem to have merged. How do you make your first impression for your flirt target:
a) Make jokes about my friends to show I’m the dominant one in the group 💪🎺
b) Keep silent, watch and observe 🕶🐔🥴
c) Compliment the one I’m most attracted to, and flirt 🥴😇
d) Interact with the ones I’m not attracted to, ignoring the one I like best.😘
e) Throw some negative comments towards the one I like best. Anyone that hot needs taking down a little before they will consider me a worthy catch and is probably used to flattery 💪🤡
4) Which of the following are you most likely to shout out if you see someone hot walking down the street you’d like to flirt with?
a) Have dinner with me!🥴💪🤡
b) Hey do you have the time?😇🥴
c) I would say nothing and see which way they went 🕶😘
d) Pretend to trip and fall to see if they come over to help😇🐔🎺
5) There is a hot barista in your favourite coffee shop. Do you:
a) Go there for coffee as often as you can to spend time with them 😇🐔
b) Deliberately throw your coffee on the floor so they have to come over and talk to you 🎺💪🤡
c) Watch when they leave and try to work out their shift pattern so you can be there when they are, and see where they go when they leave 🕶
d) Strike up a conversation the first time you are there to try to find out more about them and show your casual playful charm 😘
6) You are in a bar. Someone hot is in your line of sight. How do you approach them to flirt?
a) I walk straight up to them to show I’m commanding, look them in the eye and start conversation. Just like that. Flirting is confidence 💪
b) I approach diagonally so as to be seen but not be too confrontational, then throw a fleeting comment or ask a question 😘
c) I approach from behind so they can’t see me and then surprise them with a witty comment 🕶🥴🤡
d) I don’t approach. I take fleeting glances from the side and wait to see if an opportunity for flirting presents itself 😇🐔
e) I get loud, do something with the people where I am and show off to hope to attract their attention without seeming like I’m trying to show my value 🎺🤡
7) when is the best time to send nudes/dick pics/boob pics?
a) As a hello- first message, to get their attention 🎺🕶🤡
b) Never. Unless we are apart and have established a sexual relationship and we are missing each other 🐔😇
c) When requested. And even then they will be playful, tasteful and teasing and part of the flirtation 😘
d) When they have messaged something flirtatious, to show the effect it has had on me 💪
e) Strictly in comedy format, with props or a smiley face or something to take the tension away 🥴
8) You’ve gone on a date with a hottie, flirted and you are thinking about going in for a kiss. What do you do?
a) Wait for them to make the first move. You want to be sure. 🕶🐔
b) Ask to kiss them 😇🥴
c) Stare into their eyes, come slightly closer, and do a sideways smile like you are imagining them naked, then gradually pull them closer 😘
d) Tell them you want to kiss them, then whisk them up into an embrace. Passion sells, right? 😘💪🎺
e) Try to engage them in a game of truth or dare so you have an excuse 🤡
f) tell them it will be a laugh so you can both cross something off your never have I ever list 🎺
How do your flirting skills add up?
Count up all the icons that relate to your answers, and see where your tendency lies. Are you a Cassanova? Or a Cassanunder? Are you flirt alert or pepper spray?
🐔 The chicken: You see what you want, but you feel like you have neither the value or the skills to try to go after it. Happy to watch and wait forever, rather than take a risk. Shy, socially awkard or just waiting for the magical moment fate plonks your perfect individual in front of you, who you will somehow win over without trying, the chicken lives in us all.
Main stategy: delay and see if something happens
Biggest fear: rejection. Affirmation that rejection is due to all the worst things they imagine about themselves.
🎺 The attention whore: You imagine yourself super-confident, but your effort to constantly self promote smacks of insecurity. All the selfies, all the stories about yourself, all the time. Every conversation is an opportunity for you to showcase, to demonstrate one-upmanship and to portray your intrinsic worth to whoever might be there. Who they are, almost becomes irrelevant. They are a prize to be won, and an accessory to add to your cabinet, for future showcasing. Of course, this isn’t really who you are. Underneath it, you just desperately want to be seen. Heard. Understood. Given approval. To heal the wounds you need to glaze. With the right person. The person before you that you now so much want to impress.
Main strategy: Demonstrate worth.
Biggest fear: Being overlooked
😇 The friend-zoned: whether you are a ‘nice guy’ or a woman of value that just doesn’t seem appreciated, your watch and wait and grow slowly approach just never seems to take flight. Over and over, you feel overlooked for those who are clearly far less suitable for the object of your affection. You wait and dream of the day that they finally see you and all your worth. Of course, they won’t. They never do. Your back-door low risk option has ever failed to win hearts, because it lacks courage. If you present as a friend, a friend is all you will ever be.
Main strategy: learn more and find a short-circuit to the heart and loins, without risking loss
Biggest fear: Trying and failing.
🤡 The jerk: You are the master of ‘the neg’, a pro at turning any insult into your comedic set-up and twisting your surroundings to your purpose. Anyone and anything can be the foil for your entertainment, including the person you most want to impress. Preferring to be known as an arse than as a person who can be hurt, you can wear your ascerbic armour in many forms.
Main strategy: hit them before they hit you. Take them down a peg, so they feel they are on your level, then you might have a shot.
Biggest fear: Looking weak. Being shown to genuinely care.
😘 The player: Well versed in the arts of social success, the player has no shortage of options and ‘platonic friends’ of their preferred target gender, yet may have less in others. For you, it is a game, a sport and a skill you practice. You enjoy the mastery of it more than the prize.
Main strategy: keep your options open, use your skills. Everything is a learning opportunity.
Biggest fear: Intimacy, with the responsibility for the feelings of others, and potential hurt for yourself that can come with it
💪 The bully: If you are male, you may find you frighten women and men as often as you attract them. If you are a woman, others will be both in awe and terrified of you. You wield your dominance like a weapon.
Main strategy: establish control
Biggest fear: Appearing vulnerable
🕶 The stalker: You like to find out everything behind the scenes, and use your intelligence to collate information on a prospective match. Why ask someone to share something with you when you can quietly find it out for yourself without them ever even knowing you showed an interest? Never a trusting type, this individual tends to create a fantasy idol, who they then distrust, and create the seeds of their own destruction. By finding information and controlling all of the extrinsic factors, this one hopes to control the result. Free will be damned.
Main strategy: Gather information to plan manoeuvres, to cleverly snare your prize
Biggest fear: Revealing genuine interest results in rejection. Losing control.
🥴 The muppet: Also the fanboy/fangirl. This individual likes to revel in the purity of expressing idolisation to an individual who is, in fact, human. Unwilling or unable to run any basic level of game or establish personal value in the eyes of the object of their desire, they resort to compliments, gifts, doting and inappropriately early suggestions to further their involvement.
Main strategy: Make the desired feel good with compliments
Biggest fear: Failure. Having to try- to genuinely learn, step out the comfort zone of rejection and view the possibility of success with genuine, measured effort, take the time to learn the truth about someone and make the fantasy a reality is much more challenging than clowning around. To invest, truly, with no certainty of success, is much harder than to accept doom from the start.
So it seems there’s no right answer? And I’m willing to bet everyone is a mixed bag, or has been at least in different points in their life. So what is the point of a quiz with no aspirational goal?
Perhaps it is this.
Seeking validation and representing oneself a certain way to others is ultimately always dysfunctional. The goals we have, as pertain to acquiring another human to complete us, entertain us, or show us to have worth, always boil down to one of these behavioural zodiacs. And that’s okay. There’s no lasting right answer. No man is an island, but our paths and adventures weave us together, with others, for however long that may last. When we can recognise our habits and what they say about us, we can choose to make changes, or carry on. But seeing ourselves objectively and crafting our lives with an open mind makes for far more interesting adventures.
Perhaps, when you get down to it, in a way we are all a little creepy.
*This quiz is created for the purposes of entertainment and consideration of flirting habits to reflect on, and does not constitute professional advice, a substitute for therapy or psychological support. If your answers have concerned you, please consult a professional. None of the answers presented are right in every circumstance, nor is there any correct way to be oneself and infallibly attract the object of one’s affection.
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