there's a risk of demonizing certain kinds of porn and certain people, making wide generalizations and assumptions about the whole industry and the ethics of it, when really it's pretty complicated and diverse. But as a consumer, 'pay for your porn' is the most important thing.
your partner(s) are getting down to business, clothing coming off and sex fantasies all ready to happen.
Then, looming in from the shadows comes 'that guy'. He's staring silently, looking like a supervillain's henchman, or smiling maniacally, all alone. He's standing a little too close for comfort, cock in hand, stroking himself off to your frolics.
Here is where I tell you how to take down the hard to capture unicorn. Executed correctly, it is ruthlessly effective. It is also, in its whole, though not necessarily its parts, very dishonest. This is the strategy for the couple who are all about the hunt. For whom the intellectual and primal challenge are the motivator, rather than necessarily the end product. It is completely unethical in its construction, yet if done right, everyone goes away happier than any other strategy I know of. Sorry, my unicorns, here is where I expose your Achilles' heel.
If you rush things; if you make your lust for sex a thing that is to be feared, that is not controllable, your unicorns will flee from you. Be like the old bull, not like the Red Bull. Take your time. Build their trust. Walk down the hill slowly, and fuck them all.
Everyone's guilty of making assumptions at some time....judgement is human nature, it's a survival tactic...so you can't be too hard on people about it...just put them right when they make an assumption of you, if you care enough to...mostly I don't care enough about other people's opinions of me...the time I care is when I actually care about the person making the assumption.
